lay off.

i need to lay off the cheez-its. seriously. ive gained about 10 lbs and i think about 7 of it is made up solely of cheez-its and pepperoni. haha. that was a forced typed laugh. its really no laughing matter.

my mind has been swirling with many things lately. not good or bad things. life things. but all things i cannot seem to make sense of. my mind sounds something like this…

songs write songs new books write a book mystery lovestory lifestory babystory write grammar sucks you suck at storytelling altogether school need to finish school impossible to prioritize school with baby baby baby theres going to be a baby in here one bedroom upgrade??? move back closer to home not home home but maybe Deleware friends are the best i have the best ones i love them life is so different now but a good different guitar where is my guitar do i have picks should work on learning more chords God church need a church that is challenging not “feel-good” why are churches so lame and no wonder this country is going down the tubes will everyone shut up about miss california shes pretty lame why did God plan this for me He must know something about me that I have yet to figure out Fat feeling so fat and am only going to get and feel fatter ugly that girl over there is way prettier wouldnt Ian rather be with her stop being stupid pepperoni we ran out i ate it all last night oh no was my advice too harsh is she mad at me oh well its the truth and if she didnt want to know she shouldnt have asked right water water i have to drink more bills ballys school loans the truth tell the truth insurance premiums crazy boy or girl boy boy i want a boy but will get a girl im convinced so start getting used to pinks and purples now ians so cute sweetheart curtains we have different taste whats wrong with blue? mothersday im a mother its my day i will hopefully be a mother for the rest of my life crying no sleep i need to sleep when will i stop being selfish dinner no more pepperoni.

yeah i wrote that out in less than a minute. seriously. i cant make my brain stop spinning around and around in circles and its driving me nuts. but i dont think that theres anything i can really do.

lol.

happy mothers day!

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2 Responses to “lay off.”

  1. Wow. It sounds like you have a lot going on. I can’t believe NYC is still 4 whole hours away. I’m going to be living like right across the water in NJ over the summer and I thought it would be fun if you took the train to NYC for the day and we went baby shopping but 4 hrs is way long for you to be on a train. So that sucks.

  2. livedreamlife Says:

    i miss you…you are just too funny and one of these days i’m going to have to come visit….
    BTW i deleted my Myspace Account so the only way you would be able to contact me is through my blog or emial since you don’t have a facebook anymore…

    Kpbutler@marauder.millersville.edu

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