Its amazing

how, when you ask God to open your eyes to the things you struggle with, He sometimes uses other people to help point these things out. It wasnt until today, that I realized that my view of “romantic relationships” has been off for many years. I let the world, the culture, skew my views of dating and marriage. Today, I got the urge to watch a whole series about marriage. The way God intended marriage. (its at northpoint.org if youre interested). It just made me see the holiness of marriage, I saw what marriage was, through God’s eyes.  Characteristics of a Godly husband and characteristics of a Godly wife. & I am so greatful God showed me this. Then, I was talking to a friend today who shared with me that he felt convicted when doing physical things with someone he knew he probably wasnt going to marry. i got to thinking, would i have felt convicted in that situation?? no. probably not. it was just a kiss. why did he feel so heavy about something that “was no big deal?” well, according to the world, it was no big deal… but how he saw it, was that he was kissing someone else’s future wife. She didnt belong to him, so he had no right doing those things with her. I used to feel that way, too. Where did my conviction go? I numbed myself, when I should not have. I had adopted the thoughts of the fallen world around me. Well, God stirred up my soul.

& Im telling you this right now. The next person I kiss, will be my husband. Not someone who I think will be my husband, not someone who says he wants to be my husband, but my husband. no if ands or buts about it. I just think about all the times ive given of myself in situations, and regret it later. I wonder how much more peaceful a separation would have been, if I had guarded myself physically and emotionally. Im getting a picture of what a true Godly relationship is supposed to look like. What a true, Godly marriage is supposed to look like. And I want that more than anything. To raise a family who loves and serves the Lord who loves us.  Whenever God has that for me, is fine. Im not rushing in to anything. I have to be sure. But as I am waiting, Im no longer just going to give away pieces of myself. My promise ring means so much more now. 🙂

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