I dont like being at school, because I dont like how prone to depression I become. I seriously dont know whats wrong with me. I feel bad for everyone who has to deal with me when Im like this, because it can be really frustrating. I mean, maybe its like how people suffer from seasonal depression (because there is less sunlight in the winter, sunlight makes people happy, etc.) ya know? maybe its because i miss my friends.

anyways, i know why im sad. im sad because i havent been reading, and i havent been to church all week. thats why im upset. i need to get it together. I need God to be happy. not only that, but I need to be actively seeking Him, praying, reading, praising all of that that I tend to brush off when I come here.

This is what is important to me. I cant neglect it. Even though it may draw attention to me. Even though it makes me different than a lot of other people, I need to get over it and understand that standing up, does mean standing out.  


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