36 weeks

for some reason, this is some kind of milestone for me. 36 weeks. it means the hospital i want, will be delivering my baby and not transferring me to worcester. it means that if the baby were born next week, he would be considered full term. it means that i could go into labor at any time!

speaking of going into labor, friday was a little scary. i was having contractions, and i thought that maybe it could have been the beginning of labor but the contractions never intensified and they didnt get closer together either. eventually they disappeared altogether. i was a little disappointed, but it forced me to pack my hospital bag finally! hahaha. although ian has been stealing my blow pops!!! hahaha he better replace them!

anyways, this constant aware and anxious frame of mind im in is kind of enjoyable. ive never had something sooooo big to look forward to! and knowing that it could happen at any minute of any day is really exciting at this point.  Every ache and twinge and uncomfortable movement, i get anxious about (anxious in a good way).

so tomorrow is our next doctors appointment. After tomorrow i will be seeing her weekly which is also exciting. I must say, im not the biggest fan of my doc so far. BUT maybe that will change in the next few weeks. Maybe things will stop being so short and pointless and ill feel somewhat significant. Maybe i will remember the things i want to ask. although, everything i want to know has really been answered by the many many books and online resources ive been obsessed with for the past 9 months. haha.

anyway, im really excited. thats about all.

i want

i want to go into labor! every day i wake up hoping todays the day!! i guess its gonna be like this til he decides to come!

5 weeks and counting…

Last week went by pretty quickly! Maybe it was my going to the hospital for dehydration. awesome. i actually am glad i went though.

My doctor has been on vacation and I have not seen her since August 5th, and my next appointment isnt until August 31st, and thats a loooooooong gap when youre in your last trimester! So visiting the hospital and having them check on the baby and do all of those tests on me was actually very comforting once it was found everything was alright. So a couple days later, someone from the doctors calls me with abnormal results from one of the tests, and i got all freaked out. turns out its only a UTI thank goodness so they put me on antibiotics for that.

I wish i didnt have to work. I wish i could just relax and rest and everything from here on out, but we cant really afford it and i think part of my MIGHT go a bit stircrazy anyways. But my job is not easy to do when you have a basketball strapped to your stomach.  It takes me sooooo long to change the kids and do their routines with them and everything. Its also kind of hard because the people i work with the most have never been pregnant and dont understand how bad my back hurts or why it takes me so long to give the kids their showers. lol. dont get me wrong, they are really nice and everything but i wish they experienced what im going through so they could understand that i have good days and bad days.

I must say, im disappointed in my recording of my first pregnancy. Ideally, I would have written down week by week every symptom, ache, pain and emotion ive experienced, but i just didnt feel like it. oh well. ill hopefully do something to that effect from here on out.

So here goes!

As far as pains go, Ive been having back cramps like crazy. BUT ive been sleeping MUCH better!!!! so, given the choice, i would much rather be able to sleep through annoying back cramps then stare at the ceiling all night long.

Emotionally im ready for Anthony to come out! Im excited to go in to labor. really, i am. i think ill be able to handle the pain pretty well (until the epidural at least) and im excited to get goin!! So every little twinge i feel i get all hopeful that its labor and am disappointed when they dont get stronger.  I mean, i dont want to rush him out or anything like that. You should see some of the crazies on the message boards who are trying to induce themselves into labor!! I dont want him to come out before he is ready, but i am hoping that he is ready soon!!

But this is my prediction:::::

Anthony is going to be late. He likes it too much in there! Im going to get an induction date, and maybe a day or two before im supposed to be induced, he will decide to make his appearance. Its not going to be an easy labor at all…. im anticipating 14-16 hours.  He will be 7lbs 12 oz and a cutie pie!! Hopefully he has daddys eyes!

hahaha. that was fun. ok. i think im done for now… im takin it one week at a time!

Dreams

Last night I had weird dreams as usual, but throughout all of my dreams I had severe stomach crampy pain like I was in labor. It was never addressed or explained in my dream though. And when i woke up i felt fine. The baby was moving, & everything was normal.

6 more weeks…

Until he is here! (Lord willing)  I think my pregnancy has become a bit more unbareable because its so hot.  if it were wintertime, I may not be as uncomfortable as i am right now. Im so tired lately too, almost the same way I felt during my first trimester.

Im really excited for the last day of work which is 9/18! A little over a month to go!

I have not really decided on which way to go as far as labor goes. Part of me wants to try to do it naturally, but then the other part of me knows that im gonna get in there and want some medication once the pain gets too bad. So what i think im going to do is keep the option of medication open, and ill decide on the day. The only thing that kind of freaks me out is that because i work late afternoons and nights, and ian works during the weekends, we arent able to go to any child birthing classes or anything like that, and i just have a feeling that i shouldnt try to go natural without preparing in some way. so, maybe with the next kid ill prepare more or something. who knows?

Ive been reading a lot about labor and delivery and surprisingly it doesnt scare me at all.  im a little freaked out by the possibility of a c section, only because ive never been under any anaesthesia before in my life, and the whole being awake while being cut open thing bothers me.  I know an epidural is an epidural, but that makes me nervous just because i have no idea how (or if) my body reacts to numbing or anything like that.  But as far as the contactions or pushing or any of that goes, im as cool as a cucumber for the time being. But my biggest concern is the baby being ok.  Im so scared that hes going to come out with the cord wrapped around his neck. I cant get that thought out of my head.

But yeah, i thought i would update a tad. Overall i feel pretty good. there are no complications or anything like that so thats alwyas good. I am just feeling very anxious and my emotions go up and down very often which is frustrating for me and my husband too, im sure. Who, by the way is simply amazing. He is incredible and I am so so so so so so so so so blessed to have him. I dont know what i would do without him. Im a lucky lady.

Thats all for now.

6 long weeks left…